Bell-ringer: Rewrite the three boring sentences below to make them more interesting. Your sentences should employ vivid adjectives, strong verbs, metaphors, similes, and personification.
1. The girl played on the playground.
2. The view from the mountain was pretty.
3. Lisa and her sister fought.
Peer-edit Guidelines
1. Read your partner's essay aloud. Read it exactly as it is written. If there are no pause marks (commas, semicolons) or end marks, then read the essay accordingly.
2. Is there an effective hook? Does the analysis of the hook assist you in understand the topic?
3. Do the paragraphs flow from one to the next? Are there effective transitions? If not, mark where you become confused by the progression of ideas.
4. Does each paragraph of the body start with a clear topic sentence? Do the sentences that follow support the topic sentence?
5. Does the essay include reference to the two different documents we read in class?
6. Does the conclusion begin with a sentence that restates the thesis? Is the conclusion strong? What are you left thinking?
7. Mark any fragments; fix any run-on sentences.
8. Change any contractions or first- and second- person pronouns.
9. Check the mechanics. Correct homophone issues.
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